new (and old) music friday #30: gerard way, busted, l devine

to say the last few weeks have been testing would be an understatement. from patronising comments (all my by men, might i add) about how i need to know more about politics and completely dismissing my ideas in group projects, to my inner monologue telling me that maybe the one thing i always thought i was supposed to do with my life perhaps isn't what i wanted after all, i've pretty much experienced the entire spectrum of human emotion. 

now i've landed somewhere in the middle, trying to take on any criticisms of my work and understanding that i'm only just getting started in the world of ~journalism~ and that not everything i do will be pulitzer-prize winning and that just because the first ever magazine pitch i made didn't receive a response doesn't mean my career is over before it even started. 

i've also made a point of not checking my "work" email when i get home in a bid to Chill The Fuck Out, which feels excellent, especially in a time where working oneself to death is constantly being glamourised and seen as the only way to Make It. 

my faith that what i want to do within journalism has been somewhat restored thanks to a serendipitous session about feature writing, and i had a glorious moment when we were shown a series of introductions and asked to guess what they were about. one of them had the headline "bigger than the beatles" and instantly i knew it was about one direction, a fact that i, a 23 (!) year old woman, delivered to the room with not a shred of shame. i only wish the guy who had chastised me for my lack of political expertise had been there to see it, but sadly he was absent that day. 

nevertheless, despite being the only person to put my hand up when he asked who would like to go into feature writing, it reminded me that though my love of writing has been somewhat stifled by the more ~serious~ news writing we've been doing, the possibility of ~creative freedom~ isn't totally out of reach, and someday i might have my own column where i can scream about harry styles to my heart's content. 

until then, i'm retreating back into the comfort of my own blog, where word counts and super-snappy headlines (15 words or less!) need not exist, to talk about the one thing that's kept me alive for nearly ten (!) years; music new and old. 

1. gerard way

everyone's favourite emo made his return to the music world with baby you're a haunted house, a scuzzy lo-fi track reminiscent of his excellent solo album hesitant alien. hopefully this means more music is on the way, but until then i've rediscovered my love of my chemical romance and have had summertime, bulletproof heart, teenagers, i don't love you and the legendary i'm not okay (i promise) on repeat, and am pleased to report i'm still word perfect. 

2. busted 

keeping with the pop punk theme, busted also marked their return to music with nineties, a super nostalgic track about their childhoods, which is fitting given that their iconic bangers crashed the wedding, year 3000 and what i go to school for soundtracked many of the primary school discos i attended. ever since charli xcx and troye sivan (who i recently acquired tickets to see next february) released 1999, i've put on my rose tinted glasses and have been reminiscing about growing up in a world unconcerned with instagram likes and snapchat filters.

3. allie x 

the canadian singer released her latest EP super sunset, which deals with her last five years spent living in LA. i highly recommend reading this interview she did with paper for more insight into the alter egos she's created to tell the story, not unlike marina did with electra heart. every track is a piece of synth-pop excellence but my favourites include science, little things, focus and girl of the year. 

4. the japanese house 

after what feels like forever, the genius that is amber bain returned with two incredible tracks, lilo and follow my girl, ahead of the release of her debut album good at falling next macrch. both tracks deal with her breakup from fellow musician marika hackman, who appears in the video for lilo. 

it would seem there's a trend emerging of remaining amicable with exes; first ariana's smash hit thank u, next (i am living for her recent take-down of sexist pig piers morgan) and now this video, which sees the two embracing as a fire rages behind them. personally i've never believed people who say they're still friends with an ex, but from what i've seen and read about amber, it seems they're very much on good terms. 

the tracks remain minimal as ever, but i've noticed that on her last few releases, she's allowed her own voice to come through, no longer lost in a sea of autotune like on her first EP. there's also a sense of freedom emanating from lilo as she realises she's enough on her own; the line it felt good, it felt transitional / a feeling i'd been waiting on seemed particularly poignant as i've realised that though i've lost a few "friends" this last year, it was probably, definitely for the best. 

5. carly rae jepsen

in keeping with this theme, the light of my life carly rae jepsen released a new song, party for one. i'll admit it did take me a few listens to really get into, but now i can't get enough. here's hoping her disco-inspired album will be on the way sometime soon. 

6. l devine 

it's no secret that pop music is becoming relentlessly gay by the second. with hayley kiyoko being dubbed "lesbian jesus" and heather from pale waves declaring "yes i'm gay" on twitter (i must also give a mention to their cover of last christmas, aka the only festive-themed song not ruined by working in retail), there's no shortage of female artists unafraid of sharing their sexuality with the world. 

however it wasn't always so easy, something l devine - first name olivia - explores in one of the tracks from her new mixtape peer pressure. all the songs are objectively excellent, but daughter hit me particularly hard as she declares her love for another girl whose mother isn't so accepting of their relationship. 

though fans had speculated about the singer's sexuality for a while (see: the comments on her video for like you like that), this song lays it all out on the table. though it's an incredibly important song, it's a tale that could have been ripped straight out of my teenage diary, making it hard for me to listen to at times. nevertheless, i've had it on repeat and eagerly await her next release. 

7. king princess

sticking with the Relentlessly Gay theme, we may have hit its peak with the latest track from king princess. titled pussy is god, the lyrics really need no explanation, but this kind of bold celebration of female sexuality is something we've been lacking ever since pop music started its transition into something decidedly less hetero. it was only last year that pitchfork produced an in-depth piece on the lack of same-sex pronouns in pop songs, so imagine the shock of listeners everywhere when mikaela strauss boldly declared "she's god and i found her" on the aforementioned track. 

i've said it before and i'll say it again; representation is everything. though i'm newly 23, it's only in the last few months that i've fully accepted my own sexuality and though i'm overjoyed that teenagers these days have a plethora of role models to look up to, i only wish i'd had just one to reassure me that what my 14 year old self was feeling was totally normal. 

new (and old) music friday #24: kim petras, troye sivan, blair st. clair

i knew it had been a while since my last new music friday post, but didn't realise quite how long. when i checked the tag i saw my latest one was in october last year, and though my last post discussed some recent releases that failed to wow me, luckily there have been a few songs i've been loving since then. 

1. blair st. clair

it's safe to say that i'm now a fully fledged drag race fan. after years spent ignoring related tweets and tumblr posts that would often appear in my feed, i finally watched season nine and all stars three, and am now totally invested in series ten. no spoilers here, but after a powerful revelation during the main stage panel, broadway loving queen blair st. clair released her first single now or never, a solid Club Banger that also has the ability to reduce me to tears and make me feel like That Bitch, and i've been repeating the lines i've come undone but now i pulled myself back together and i'm gonna turn the tide / i'm gonna live my life the way i want to non-stop to myself as a reminder that i'm already doing so much better than i ever thought possible after a hellish few months. 

2. kim petras

by far my most played artist in recent months, i fell in love with kim after hearing unlock it and immediately went to seek out more of her sound. tracks like hillside boys, faded, heart to break and i don't want it at all are pure pop perfection and so sugary sweet they might just give you a cavity or three. 

3. troye sivan

with the exception of kim, my my my! is still dominating my top 25 played songs on itunes, and nothing has come close to replacing it yet. enter then, troye's brand new single bloom, which i loved as soon as i pressed play and is definitely a strong contender for my favourite song of the year so far. bringing that same euphoric chorus and synth-driven sound of his first single, it finally feels like spring has sprung when i walk around with this blaring from my headphones. i've also been loving the slightly more low-key strawberries and cigarettes, released as part of the soundtrack for love, simon. 

4. janelle monae

upon first listen i was disappointed with dirty computer, the latest release from the kansas city native, but pynk was a real standout. a collaboration with grimes, whose influence can be heard ever so subtly, the mary sue describes it as a "glorious celebration of female sexuality" and the video is also filled with euphemisms about said anatomy. it's also Quite Gay - monae recently described herself as a pansexual, "free ass motherfucker" - and ensures her a place on the list of artists like troye and hayley kiyoko who aren't afraid to talk - and sing - openly about their sexuality. 

5. king princess

another artist refusing to hide who she is goes by the name of king princess, who recently did her first ever interview for i-D magazine. her debut single 1950 received a shout-out from the light of my life harry styles, but other than that i didn't pay much attention to it until a few days ago when i found myself re-listening. i wasn't prepared for the punch to my chest as i pored over the lyrics, which pay tribute to those unable to be open about their sexuality during a time when it was still illegal to be gay; the line tell me why my gods look like you / and tell me why it's wrong brought tears to my eyes. second single talia is an ode to heartbreak, and i can tell it too will be on heavy rotation.

5. ariana grande 

april 20th saw the release of ariana's comeback single no tears left to cry. while i was secretly hoping for something along the lines of into you or greedy, this low-key bop has slowly worked its magic and been in my head non-stop since i first heard it. she also released an exciting new video and debuted a blonde low ponytail as part of her new era, with new album sweetener arriving sometime in july. again this song has provided a much needed boost of positivity and just like ariana, it feels like a new start for me. i've also been loving this remix of into you by 3LAU, which is a perfect Getting Ready To Go Out track.

6. CHVRCHES

i was decidedly negative about their latest releases in my last post but one song i just can't get enough of is their cover of somebody else by the 1975 which they performed during their stint on radio 1's live lounge. it doesn't differ much from the original, which is exactly why i like it as the two bands have both embraced an 80s-inspired electronic sound in recent years and i would love to see a collaboration between them someday. 

the 1975 however, have been driving people (me) mad with the deletion/restoration of their social media accounts, ominous posters popping up in london and manchester and a mysterious countdown has now appeared on their website, suggesting new music will be released at the start of june. someone on twitter has provided a handy guide to all the references they've thrown at us so far, but set aside five or ten minutes to scroll through as there's a lot to take in. 

my favourite theory so far is that lorde is also in on the act too, having deleted all her instagram posts and posted the cover of guy debord's book, the society of the spectacle, who the 1975 have referenced in the lyrics for loving someone. it's still too early to say for sure, but i'd like to think they're collaborating in some way and am eagerly awaiting the end of this ominous countdown. 

these songs - and many others i've been enjoying lately - can be found here.